Occasionally we highlight some of the inadvertently funny and off-kilter posts on Austin Craigslist. This time around we hit the "Musicians Wanted" section.
Today, you'll meet Kyle the electric saw player (?!) whose last group claimed the title "Worst Band in Portland." Cory, who claims to have a drummer but needs a microphone to "do all the screeches." Or how about the dude who only samples from Tarantino flicks and shuns signing to major labels cuz "they have lawyers and ... lawyers tend to suck."
Meanwhile, a "dude with long hair" figures musicians might know where to get a decent haircut for cheap. And a band looking for a frontman keeps it simple: got a kilt? You're in! One frustrated Craigslister offers some tips on how to post a musicians wanted ad, such as requesting a video clip of them actually playing an instrument. Good advice.
And last, but definitely not least, the Glen Campbell/James Taylor/Randy Travis/Frank Sinatra impersonator. It took some digging but we found his YouTube cartoon. It's at the bottom. And you're welcome.
There's a New Electric Singing Saw Player in Town...
Hello Austin! I'm an electric singing saw player that just moved here from Portland, Oregon. I play a '94 Sandvikens Stradivarius singing saw with a modified K & K mike, and a pedal board chock ful o' pedals to back up my sonic onslaught. Available for recordings (I work for song credit, food, beer and 5 copies of the final album!) and I'm also interested in joining a band or two. Examples of my latest work can be found here: http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/mollybang
http://austin.craigslist.org/muc/3532740632.html
Need a Microphone to train my voice
I desperately need to TRAIN my voice. I've just begun putting a band together, I've got a drummer, elusive one [Ed. note: aren't they all]. I need a MICROPHONE, someone please tell me if you have: A Mic in a warehouse, empty stage, room, I can't pay anything right now, however, in about a month I can. If you can help me, set-up a time, someplace PLEASE email me.
I'm going to need to train from scratch again, because I'm finally here in Austin. I need to do all of the screeches, and loud sounds while I'm writing lyrics. Can you help me? Thanks, CORY
http://austin.craigslist.org/muc/3577719473.html
Storytellin Rap MC Needed
The Plan: create a new hiphop album with some fresh MCs (flows I dig: Ghostface Killah, Scarface, Raekwon, DOOM, RZA, GZA, Common)
The Media Hook: I'll make all the beats using samples taken exclusively from Quentin Tarantino flicks & their soundtracks. (Remember The Grey Album? Replace the Beatles with Tarantino tunes and your fresh verses...that's what we're aiming for)
The Money: We're going to avoid major labels if at all possible, because they have lawyers and in my experience lawyers tend to suck. Think underground. But think that the hype of having an album exclusively made up of album cuts & dialogue taken from Reservoir Dogs to Django Unchained, and I think it's safe to assume that with a few well-placed copies of the finished album, word of mouth will spread. And then we'll all get notorious and sign proper record deals.
Have a listen to a sample of the beats I'm cooking up: https://soundcloud.com/turnquist
http://austin.craigslist.org/muc/3547526830.html
Huntress Diana & MaestroPhil Duo looking for A CRASH SPOT FOR TONIGHT
CHECK OUT OUR WEB PAGES
WE ARE FROM CHICAGO ON TOUR AND JUST PLAYED 6TH STREET IN AUSTIN.
We are looking to crash, very tired of sleeping in the car.
Can you dig?? We would love to meet the cool people in town. We already love Austin but we do not know ANYONE.
We really want to meet some cool peeps and do s little hanging and jamming.
We have an air mattress so no matter we will be comfortable, we are a married couple.
Our Band Infusions is from Chicago. We play light rock with lots of originaLs.
We would love to meet you and we know you'll love us.
courtesy huntressdiana.com and maestrophil.com respectively
http://austin.craigslist.org/muc/3578686465.html
Where do you get your hair cut? (For Real)
Welp....I have two afflictions (dude with long hair, cheap) that are hard to fit into search parameters on Yelp, so I thought I'd ask a community of potential like-minders: Where do you get your hair cut?
I've been going to the same place I've been going for 10 years, but alas, my go-to cutter has moved on in life and her replacement ruined her first impression with a complete hatchet job. So, basically, I'm looking for any suggestions as to where in town I can go to get a cut from men (no ladies, please) who are used to cutting long men's hair at an affordable price (would like to keep it around $20 for cut + tip). This is a real posting, so I'll save all the hatahs they time: yep, I am vain and cheap.
http://austin.craigslist.org/muc/3564643418.html
"Kilt" wearing frontman needed for new band (austin,texas)
yep, if you are frontman and wear kilts, give us a buzz.
http://austin.craigslist.org/muc/3581550933.html
Impersonator seeks gigs for SxSW
I have hard rock songs of my own: Back To Eden in the USA, and a bunch others
I imitate, James Taylor (You've Got a Friend), Glen Campbell, RANDY TRAVIS, Frank Sinatra (One More for the Road /w/guitar accompaniment)
And I have a nine minute cartoon on YouTube (A Goat On The Boat, Billy McCarty)
And published books to distribute +a follow-up book I just finished (email me; get a copy free)
http://austin.craigslist.org/muc/3543431720.html
Austin Post exclusive bonus YouTube video: "A Goat On the Boat." Click Image to View Video
